Joy and Grief

Okay I thought I was done blogging before the trip but I guess not. I am worried about several things on this trip but most are small and I can't say I have lost sleep because of it. I realize its not a big deal if we forget a few small things or a couple things go awry. I am not even that concerned if I have to stay longer in country to get Mimi's embassy paperwork together, although I am told this is unlikely. But that doesn't even phase me too much. Although two children and me alone in Ethiopia sounds a little insane and really should phase me.

The thing I worry about most is our little girl. She was so aware last time we visited that things were different and she did not do well with the change of having David and I suddenly appear. She got more use to us being around even after a few hours, but the loss she has had to endure the last month is very upsetting to me, her momma.

When she passed court she was transferred to our adoption agency's care center known as The Thomas Center. Therefore she was taken away from her nanny Ethiopia(yes, that is her favorite nanny's name) who she has been with since she was a few weeks old. I can't even think about what this probably was like for poor Mimi. And now just when she may be getting use to a new place, new nannies, new children we are going to come and pick her up and take her away.

I know some people don't think it could matter to a little person, but she is so aware of everything(I think she is brilliant) that she is going to know exactly what is happening. And while this is a joyful time for our family, I can't help but think of the loss and grief our little girl will have to endure. I know one day the loss and grief will be security and happiness and in the long run she will be better off(let's hope anyways) but please keep little Mimi in your thoughts and prayers that she will make it through as smoothly as possible.

That being said I am very excited to be leaving soon and to have our babies in my arms. I still cannot believe it is actually happening. After waiting and waiting....and waiting some more..... it seems like it all came together so quickly the last month and in just a couple weeks we will all be home!